AFTERLIFE
When living for what's after life
We put the horse behind the cart.
We should bet on the here and now
And not what's after we depart.
What's after life I do not know.
Had I the facts, I'd tell of course.
If there is one who has been there
I want these answers from that source.
Where do we go? What do we do?
Do we look on those left behind?
Please let me see the evidence.
I do not want a faith that's blind.
There is none; thus until we're there
The afterlife remains a myth.
But still I've had some idle thoughts
About it, I've been toying with.
Suppose the agents are part right;
But afterlife just mirrors life,
So when we fly to Paradise
Our baggage is our current strife.
If 'after' is linked to 'before'
That fact another message sends.
While blowing life on 'earth' to hell
The life in 'heaven' also ends.
So just in case, it would be wise
On earth a heaven to create.
Then if there is an afterlife
We'll find it in a peaceful state.
Sunday, April 6, 2008 at 07:02AM
Reader Comments (44)
u r wird
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How? Why? Doug.E.Barr
Great poem. Of course you won't, bacause someone else is suggesting it, butI believe you should change "agents" to "priests" in the 5th stanza for the following reasons:
Firstly, even though your strict syllable count will be off by a half step, when you read the line as "priests," the slack is taken up nicely by the plural s and the sprung rhythm created with the alliteration.
Secondly, "agents" is too indefinte a word, creating unecessary ambiguity. In fact the word carries negative connotations half the time; i.e. "agent of the devil," "agent of the lord," "agent of evil," "agent of good." You don't want to undermine your own argument that ambiguity about an afterlife logically necessitates taking positive action in this life. Who are the agents who tell us there is an afterlife? They are the priests. Whether priests are agents of good or evil will be determined in the afterlife . . . if there is an afterlife.
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Thanks for your suggestion Jerry. In case you missed it there is a reference to travel in my poem. Agents refers travel agents, who can be anyone who tries to sell a trip to the "promised land". They are certainly priests but there are protestant pastors as well. Thus agents it will remain. Doug.E.Barr
Hmmm, social security workers now call themselves agents, too, and social security ranks right up there when you get old. Just a thought, couldn't help it.
More than once I have reflected for a short while on what an eternity in heaven would be like. I'm sure we all know that if that is what comes to pass it would have to be vastly different from anything conceivable here on earth.
But this I can conceive, though I might be wrong, and that's that without big changes some people will never be suited for it.
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We venture into a dark room, look around and emerge to tell everyone what we saw which conflicts with what everyone else saw. What is the point? Doug.E.Barr
What a downer! O ye of little faith!
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.........in what? Doug.E.Barr
Wow. That is an amazing poem! You are not weird! I am young, but my teacher told me to look at some meaningful poems and think about them. I am thinking about this meaningful poem right NOW. It is amazing. I will now look for inner meanings.
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Thanks Le, for both your compliment and for your assessment of me. It is comforting to hear a young person thinks I am "not weird!" I would be interested in hearing about the meaning you find. Doug.E.Barr
I don't think you are wierd at all. I like this poem a lot. Why do people get so caught up in the absoltue perfection of style and grammar and whether or not the flow is perfect or the way they would do it. IT IS YOUR POEM therefore your words are perfect. There is no right or wrong in poetry only someone elses opinion
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Wow, another assessment that I am not weird. That's encouraging.
I am one of those who "gets so caught up in the absolute perfection of style and grammar..."rhyme and rhythm. Whether or not you like my subject matter, the words I choose are evidence of my pursuit of perfection. In my opinion free verse is condensed prose without structure or punctuation, invented by a teacher who felt sorry for a student who didn't seem to have any sense of rhyme or rhythm; but I could be wrong. Doug.E.Barr
u get really deap
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...deep but clear to the bottom I hope. Doug.E.Barr
I think your reflection shows wisdom of what we should be focused on in the "here and now." And yet your poem still gives us an opportunity to believe in our own religion/values. Do not the majority of religions ask us to love others as one loves oneself? Do unto others as you would yourself? In this way we would be able to create a better earth while in the present. Whether or not we will pass on to a "higher and better place" remains to be seen by all of the living.
I feel that yes, faith must often be blind. As in many Southern Spirituals, slaves had to believe in the afterlife of heaven. They knew without having literacy that there must be happiness, the possiblity of a better life somewhere. How blessed we are to have more outlets to choose our beliefs, and be able to have more freedom to pursue happiness.
But trying to create a better life to our best capacity is a very high goal that would further the betterment of Earth and our society. You go, Doug!
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Literacy is irrelevant. When there is nothing to know literacy is of no advantage. Making a belief there is "a better life somewhere" absolves us of the responsibility to make a better life here. "More outlets to choose our beliefs" means more sources of conflict. Committing to beliefs restricts our "freedom to pursue happiness." Doug.E.Barr
WOW!!!!!! this is GR8!!!!!!
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I am gr8ful for your comment!!!! Doug.E.Barr
I also must agree that i do NOT think you are weird, and i liked the poem a great deal. It got me thinking. And yes i Am a young reader, but i appreciate your work.
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Yes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Another vote for "not weird" from a young reader. There may be hope. Thanks. Doug.E.Barr
I thought your poem was dead-on, so to speak and
I offer you a recent little poem of mine in the same vein:
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Thank you for commenting on my poem. I make no apologies for not commenting on yours but I will explain again why I deleted it. If I allowed everyone who wants to publish their poems to use my site it wouldn't be long before there is no room for my writing. It doesn't make sense to me to pay for a site, advertise it at considerable expense and then give the space away. I hope you understand. Doug.E.Barr
I was raised in a very strict christian home, but now that im older i really dont know what my belief is in the so called "after life",i really try not to think about it, cause its kinda freaky....knowing your dead and is there life after death. Personally i think there is, because of stories i've heard of people that died and experienced the after life, credible people too. But if your dead what difference would it make. We were born, but before that we didnt know anything. Its kinda weird to think about, but how do we really know about the after life, will we ever know? Your poem does make me think....but i think ill stop thinking cause its too deep and depressing. I like it though, keep it up:) at least it makes people think one way or the other!
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This is a delightful comment. Thinking about "Afterlife" is "kinda freaky". You did an excellent job. It is good my poem made you think. It is better you "stop thinking cause its too deep and depressing." There is only one activity more "deep and depressing" than thinking about death and that is contemplating life without meaning. It is preferable to wonder about meaning in life. Doug.E.Barr
I believe...
Energy doesn't die. It only changes from one form to another. All species are intricately related.
I don't sweat the small stuff. What would be the point. I simply try to the best of my ability to be a positive energy source. And when the time comes for this vessel or body to succumb to the elements of this existence I shall be as ready as I can be.
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Anyone who doesn't know "Energy doesn't die. It only changes from one form to another. All species are intricately related." probably believes the world is flat. Energy doesn't die and its corollary is the first law of thermodynamics. All species are related and its corollary all members of each species are related should be considered the first law of life but I sense with respect to this law humanity is dominated by "flatlanders".
I think your characterization of death as "small stuff" would have little support. Given the extensive mythologies created about continued existence after death, we should be able to agree a majority of us consider death the most significant event of our lives after birth. I really have no problem with the significance we place on death. In fact if we placed an even greater significance on death more of us would live by the "first law of life". As a consequence wars would end and no one would die of neglect.
Furthermore I do not object to a belief in a continuum of existence. What I vehemently oppose however, is assuming and believing afterlife is "a better place" thus allowing us to consider the apparent destruction of our environment "small stuff". The most we should assume is that afterlife is a continuation of life and then we can conclude heaven is hell and it is getting hotter. Doug.E.Barr
1 L1K3 TH1S P3OM SO MUCH 1T 1S SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO ASUMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM W3LL HOP3 TO H3R3 AND R3AD SOM3 GOOD ON3S L1K3 TH1S ON3!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 1 L1V3 1N MKFARLAND AKA MYFAS SUR THR3S3 FROM DA 3AST S1D3 13 D1S 1S MA VARR1O"MYFAS"!!!!!!!!!!!!!
L1L.BABY GANGST3R FROM VARR1O MYFAS SUR THR3S3 X3 13 SOUTHS1D3 MYFAS RULZ 4 L1F3 AND 4 3V3R!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Thanks for telling me. Doug.E.Barr
why do we stay alive when were unhappy with life we have all tryed to end our lives but theres nothin worse than ending ur own life so why do we just not jrop dead y dont we just end life that fast there alway somethin in us that keeps us from ending our lives our lives r just hell and ppl r tryin to fix y but ur not brokein all the shit about the deprest makes it a big deal to parents and teachers and what ever else u deal with thay dont get it a docter or a sicolijust wont help it make our lives worse even when u thin thats impossibl we r emo and we rock
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I am unfamiliar with your text typing but I think I was able to translate your note accurately. You ask a number of similar questions which humans have asked since we have been able to ask questions. Your answer "there alway somethin in us that keeps us from ending our lives" have given people hope since hope was conceived. I hope it gives you hope.
I agree with you that in their attempts to explain life, in particular to answer "the last why", the 'experts' can really mess it up. We are living the consequences of past explanations.
I am guessing "emo" means emotional and if I am right I agree we are. I have also guessed "rock" means something like "are the greatest" and if I have again guessed correctly, you rock. Thanks. Doug.E.Barr
THE "AFTER LIFE" HAS TO BE BETTER THAN EARTH,BECAUSE EARTH IS ALMOST LIKE LIVING IN HELL ANYWAYZ. I HAVE MY OWN THOGHTS ABOUT WHAT HEAVEN IS GOING TO BE LIKE. I HAVE READ CERTAIN THINGS IN THE BIBLE THAT HELP ME WITH MY IMAGINATION OF WHAT THE"AETER LIFE"IS GOING TO BE LIKE. AND IT SOUNDS ALOT BETTER THAN THIS PLACE.
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This is one of 16 comments Crystal left. If you are interested in my general response to all of them you can read it here. Doug.E.Barr
the poem puts an understanding on what we think and a deeper thought and process in our minds
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I hope in other words you said it made you think. Doug.E.Barr
Your poem is gr8 definetly one to make readers open their mindes. I think it is unfair to be judged as "weird" because of ones own ignerence. I may be just a kid but I think "Heaven" may not really be a place in religon or just personal belief but I think it and "Hell" R closer then we think. Any time we hear about or see (personal experiences) about the light at the end of the tunnel it is a blinding light, now think of the sun when we look at it, its a blinding light.The only way to get to heaven is death and we cant go to the sun because we'll die.Hell is life, hell is negativity, sin,lies,etc... demons are the desires for negativity and all that can and will harm civilization.There are no inascent exept for the unborn baby that has yet tobe exposed to "Life" and breath in the corrupt air of humanity and its "Demons".
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Some kid! Doug.E.Barr
WOW. this is crazy......... u are an awesome poet writer..... Even though it took me for ever to find all of ur poems
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I am pleased you took "forever" to look. Doug.E.Barr
I, too, like Afterlife. I, an amateur poet, Do not think I am qualitfied to make any other comments, only to say I enjoyed Afterelife. Thank You.
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I enjoyed your comment. It was professional. Doug.E.Barr